Wednesday, March 3, 2010


I left town approximately 12 hours ago. I was ready to go home six hours after I left my destination. No joke. I know I'm a loser. The thing is, I love going on vacation. I love doing new things. Until I get to where I'm going and then I spaz out. I don't know why. But I do! I feel like I am suffocating and don't know which way to turn. I try to find every excuse to go home as quickly as possible. But I am rational enough to tell myself to relax and just have a good time. That the kids don't get out enough and to enjoy what we are doing. And I do. Until I think about Gavs missing his nap. Or them not getting to sleep in their bed at exactly 7:30. Or when my two year old throws a tantrum from HELL in the middle of a hospital parking lot, running from my car, almost getting hit by another, and then throwing himself to the asphalt like I am the worst mom EVER (maybe I am). When I get to our sleeping quarters, I unpack all of their bags, repack them, and then close them up for the night to do it all over again in the morning. Freak. I know. I should just up my anti-anxiety meds a few days before I know I am leaving town so I am the same "balanced" person I am at home (at least I think I'm balanced.) I envy any one that can just pick up and go and not think twice about it! I wish I could be you. Please, tell me how you do it. I am begging you! Or just go on vacation with my family, so I can stay home and be the "hermit" I love to be. Strange thing is... I am not home A TON when I am home. Man, I really am a loser. Is anyone else like this since they have had kids!? And how do I avoid not making my kids this way?!



Shelly said...

I know what you mean about stressing over missed naps and just not being on a routine. I usually don't leave home for long either, but I'm trying to be more laid back about it when I do. Hope you have some fun!

Aaron and Bonnie said...

I wish I could help you out on this one. I just may be the complete opposite. I stress out when I have to stay at home too much. I need a good spur of the moment vacation about once a month. Nothing planned, just to leave for a bit. I hope you made it through your weekend.